The Sands Of Time.

Theirs was a bond that defied words, time and years. They willed life and strength into each other, talked to each other for hours and made each other laugh whenever they could.

He (let’s call him X) was not a warm person in any aspect of life, but inspite of that, he had been affectionate with her (let’s call her Y). His standoffishness had almost seemed like a challenge. Because of that each smile won, each warm gesture, had felt like a victory to her and all the more impressive because he showed no warmth to anyone else. Y was young then and intrigued by him. X seemed so competent, and in addition to the appeal of his pedigree, there had been a childlike innocence about him that had briefly opened the door to Y’s heart. He was passionate without guile. The loftiness of his style, his considerable attention towards her, and his exquisite manners when they had courted had elicited a kind of hero worship from her.

Inspite of X’s reputation for being tough in his dealings, he seemed extremely kind to her, which ultimately proved not to be the case. Talking to him was like a breath of fresh air, and a lifeline she clung to on dark nights. His warmth, light and almost elfin quality struck Y from the time they met. For the first time in her life, she thought X was the person she wanted to be with. His lineage was beyond reproach, and his shy, gentle, unassuming ways suited Y to perfection. He was a reasonable person with no apparent vices other than the tendency to work too hard. It was remarkable to think about how X had come into Y’s life, by sheer happenstance years before and how lucky she was.

The time they spent moved them infinitesimally closer to each other; it felt like a single sparkling diamond hanging suspended in the night sky. X became a habit, which was hard for Y to break. Theirs was a relationship that was tender, passionate and solidified by mutual trust.

They drifted apart over time, Y was aware of it. She had known for a long time that his affection for her had at first diminished, and then finally disappeared. The wall between them was one that Y never tried to scale, although she tried at first. Her every attempt at drawing closer to X was futile. He resisted all her efforts until finally she accepted the vast, lonely chasm between them as a way of life. In order to not feel shortchanged by what was not available to her, she had convinced herself and her own little world that she needed nothing from X. Their brief conversations only reinforced her feelings of being shut out of his life. He had long since become the hub of her life and he alienated her from himself. The gates to heaven never opened between them again, and she saw to it that they remain close, and stay that way.

The relationship they led was not something Y had envisioned or hoped for, but it was something that she had accepted and made peace with. His aversions to Y was so extreme, it was almost phobic. The only way X could escape it was too ignore her completely and pretend that Y never existed. He blocked her out, and put all energies into work and removed himself as much as possible from life with her.

X was so infinitely precious to Y and she did not want to jeopardize anything or anyone. She is happy to see him happy, but the truth is that it has been excruciatingly painful for her to let go of him.

I can’t tell you who X and Y is, but they are someone very close and dear to my heart!